Your Identity Is In Him NOT Them!

We have all been there girl!

Ladies, I get it, it is so easy to lose yourselves in the midst of taking care of everyone else. This doesn't just apply to the wives who are mothers, this applies to every single woman who has a certain load of responsibilities. Maybe you are the woman who just has a child or children on your own and you're trying to trust God through the process. Maybe you're the woman who is married with no children but your spouse is a load on his own. You might even be the woman who is married with your first child or multiple children and you have become tangled up in everyone else but yourself. No matter what kind of woman you are, when it comes down to taking care of others, we ALL know it's easy to lose ourselves from time to time. Well I don't know about you but today, I plan to change that narrative in my life. I dare you to join in with me in making it known that from here on out, we won't make it TOO easy to lose ourselves in our blessings and responsibilities. I am determined to make it HARD for me to lose myself. You may be reading this thinking that's no use, as wives, working wives, mothers, working or not, it's too much to handle. Well guess what, you made it this far didn't you? Now in order to make it hard to lose yourself, you first have to acknowledge where you went wrong to get yourself in that mindset. You may be thinking you should've waited to have kids or get married but I won't allow you to state easy routes around here. Where we ALL mess up at is mistaking our blessings for our identity.

How can one mistake their blessings as their identity? Well it's quite simple to slip into this and I can only speak on it because I am here right alongside you in this. When you get married or have children or gain that job, in the beginning you are just filled with so much joy but if you aren't careful you begin to label yourself as just "his wife" or "their mom" or "just another employee" or even "another statistic". You begin to slowly downplay yourself when really God didn't call you to just be someone's wife/mom/employee. Once you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, your purpose could finally break free through you. The ministry that is within you will begin to take place no matter how much you don't want it. You see ladies, our blessings are just that, blessings. Some of which were given to us simply because of grace and mercy and others are the fruits of our labor, especially the secret labors that no one sees or knows about (when you don't talk or boast/post about it). Our identity is found in God and God alone for He knows exactly who we are in Him and He knows what we are capable of. We can only know how wonderful we are in Him when we relinquish our desire to be in control of everything. This is easier said than done when you're a mother or wife or both or even someone who is constantly working. It will take time but it is possible. Now, mistaking our blessings for our identity is just one of the ways that lead us to making it too easy to lose ourselves. Another way that we make it too easy to lose ourselves is by not being careful of what we make the source of our happiness.

Who is your source of happiness?

When you become a wife or mother or even in your time of singleness, these things can easily wipe out your happiness if you make them your source. If you are always relying on your spouse or children or co workers and friends to be your source of happiness, you will be let down in more ways than one. It is high time that you realize that true happiness and peace comes from God and God alone. When you begin to change the way you view your situation ( I know, easier said than done) your mind will immediately snap back to the goodness of the Lord. An unusual amount of peace and joy will hit you even in the toughest of storms. Now being real transparent here, we all have our moments of stumbling and falling short whether it be a physical action we took, something we spoke, or even something we thought about. We've all been there and just recently I was there myself but day by day I have been speaking over myself a new mindset, peace, and many other uplifting things. You see, it's one thing to gain a good thing without doing the work because of grace and mercy. It's an entire new world to gain AND maintain the blessing because you are actually putting in the work to keep what has been given to you. In order to be able to see clearly that God is the source of your peace and happiness, your relationship with Him has to be close, strong, and unbreakable. Now let's get real here for those who have spouses and or have a little someone in their lives. When you find the RIGHT one, it's easy to CONFIDENTLY say that your bond with that person is unbreakable and nobody or nothing can come in between the two of you. Well then, why not treat God the same way? No matter what kind of hell you might be facing, you should still be able to find joy in Him because of how strong your relationship is with Him.

Not everyone will be there for the new you, be who you are regardless!

Knowing who you are in God won't always make everyone around you happy for you. Some people enjoy it when you go through an identity crisis because they know that once you realize who you are, you're a threat. In reality, if you are trying to be and stay humble, you know that there is something special for everyone but let's be real here, not everyone is willing to put in the amount of time, work, and effort to improve themselves like you did. This is why I encourage you to never be ashamed if you go through deliverance or have multiple times of receiving prayer and laying on the altar for a long time because guess what? All of these things are necessary for true transformation in both the natural and spiritual. Never be ashamed to shout the carpet off or to scream out His name because guess what? While those who doubted you are staring and talking about you, God is restoring, keeping, and elevating you because YOU are taking the steps that are needed to maintain your freedom. Once you begin to firmly know WITHOUT A DOUBT who YOU are in Christ, certain people will either begin to shy away from you or turn against you. Misery loves company and if you have changed your attitude and perspective and strategy on how you go through a thing then the pretenders will begin to fall away. You won't be able hold the same conversations that you used to. Once you have a firm grasp on who you are in Him, those who are having an identity crisis will begin to whisper to others of how you've changed and or they will try to leech onto you, trying to suck out the very newness that you fought hard to achieve and keep. This is why everyone cannot have access to you so be lead by the Holy Ghost in who you should connect with. 

 Embrace who you are in Him

Nowadays, I simply don't care how I look when I praise God in front of people and behind closed doors because I know firmly that my praise is my weapon and worship and prayer has kept me and prevented me from returning to who I used to be. Today is your day to switch up the old patterns of going through. It is time for you to be who God has called you to be regardless of what it may look like to others. A popular quote has been floating around recently and frankly it is very true: "Everyone thought that Noah was crazy until it started to rain" If you are not familiar with who Noah is then open up your Bible and go to the book of Genesis to read about the story of Noah. Recently I have decided to embrace what makes me, me and I have noticed a shift in how I handle my marriage, son, and connections for the better. Being yourself is the best form of self care than you can partake in. Do not be afraid to acknowledge where you have stumbled and fallen. Do not be alarmed by who will think what and who will stare at you when you ask for prayer or lay before the Lord in front of everyone and behind closed doors. While they are laughing, staring, and asking questions, God is keeping, restoring, and elevating you. Keep on doing what is necessary to be kept by Him. Keep asking God to renew your mind and embrace who YOU are in Him. There's only one of you and if you let God have His way with your life then great things will come forth. Don't be alarmed or look down on those who are going through an identity crisis, if they are willing to change, they'll take the steps. It's hard to lose yourself if you know who YOU are in Him!

As Always: Stay Blessed & Encouraged